rjd2 and little dragon

endless bowls of chips & guacamole, never enough of Frankie's pizza 

the dirty apple

our home away from home 

watermelon margaritas and older men

far different from the boys we knew back home 

because anything was possible

upper east girls in the fall, downtown girls all summer long

fire escape wine, Whole Foods on Houston

in heeled black boots

all black always, we were new york girls now 

rooftop sunsets so glorious 

who don't care about you.

the changing of the leaves in the park always a romanticized dream 

symbolizing the falling away from our inner seasons past

and come spring ready to shed those dark-month blues

the darkest and coldest of blues.

only in new york could we replicate a new dream, a new girl, a new friend.

i see you in a similar way to how i saw new york-

beautiful, intimidating, lonely, yet, surrounding. vibrating. 

powerful and will vanquish the others

if they don't put their foot down

or race to get ahead of you

to be on top of you.

a beautiful idea, a sort of untouchable dream. 

but then, when you have it, get close to it, you see that it's not everything you

trusted in, believed in, confided in, hoped for.

because new york will never love you back the way you love it. for anyone. 

it will never give the genuinity and the always-there-for-you aura i so needed.

i look back at new york in a similar way to how i look back at you-

fondly; such fond memories,

i no longer need that in the least.

i will look at you both on the shelf of the mind

and wave from afar.