or is it deeper? what is really the matter?

I'm learning this slowly. 

ask the man who told you he wanted to take you out, (and made subsequent plans with you that he fell through on twice) what happened.  because frankly, standing someone up is bad behavior. 

you don't need to ask him, though, why he showed up to the same bar as you on a busy night with a new, and much younger, girl on his arm. because well, your answer is already there. 

ask yourself why you are unhappy at your job, or in the state that you live in. is the sunny, humid weather and palm trees really making you loathe your existence? 

these are questions that come to be asked with time and deep acceptance and understanding. yes, a little pain and hesitation, because the words in the asking are powerful, weighty, and valuable. that's why it can be so hard to get them out, or even ask them internally. but respect that. 

ask and be ok with the answer. accept what you may not want to hear. 

he's just not that into you. 

you need to focus on school and you will find a better job. 

you need to accept that people have hurt you, and while it's wrong and sad and gross, you will and must move forth. 

ask and you will receive.